He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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