Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
I'm telling everyone at work the mark on my neck is a hickey but really I was taking a shit while straightening my hair and burned myself
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
Randomize
