Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
So I'll spare the details, but I think I discovered I'm lactose intolerant. In my sleep. And you'll be needing new sheets.
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
Ok fuckface listen up and listen good. 1.calling dibs on a chick out of your league is like applying for a job with a highlight video 2. dont fucking ski down the stairs again 3. if you do, put it on your highlight video
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
Randomize
