It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
