As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
Can we just focus for a minute on the fact that I HAD MY FIRST LESBIAN ENCOUNTER.
Right. How rude of me to inform you that you're going to be an aunt.
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
Lynn just told me "I heard about your divorce. Condoms or morning pill your choice and I'm buying". Sorry but I got plans now bro.
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
Randomize
