dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
I know I'm high, but the dude in target definitely just told me that it's best to walk through every door in life like you're a t-rex....
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
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