The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
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