Just cropdusted the office
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
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