Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
I wasn't so much your wingman at that point as I was the interpreter of you point at shit and mumbling to the cab driver.
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
He literally asked permission to hit on me
Randomize
