Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
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