small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
Randomize