so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
You poured a bottle of water into the salad bowl and said "bowls are a joke" and then poured it into your lap.
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
Randomize
