I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
If you think hives from an allergic reaction to lube is funny, remind me to tell you the story about how I got a black eye from masturbating.
I told her we had to stay at the bar until at least midnight because that's when my direct deposit hit, don't tell me i'm not responsible
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
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