dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
He caught me shoving meatballs into my mouth using my hand. Fuck utensils. It’s Christmas...and this is why I’m single.
They are good meatballs.
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