Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
You came in yelling "I'm el scorcho" and then axe can flamethrowered my dresser. Awesomeness aside, you owe me a new dresser.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
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