So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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