He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
Just had a 10 minute long conversation with my cat about how if I died, and he needed to eat me to live, I'd totally be ok with it. Definitely still drunk.
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Randomize
