i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
Birthday wine tasting got super shambly super quickly. I am covered in cuts/bruises/terrible life decisions.
Randomize
