Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
two words...techno handjob
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
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