just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
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