called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
Randomize
