Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
I fell asleep on the table at Denny's. Told the waitress to wake me up when my burger was there.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
we're at the bar celebrating my ex bootycall getting his new gf pregnant... and me narrowly escaping a future as kitty foreman
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
Randomize
