im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
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