dude i woke up to 20 missed calls from you, 3 from a blocked number and had 13 voicemails that all said "send me a picture of your tits."
so im guessing thats a no.....
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
