this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
it seems as if every mistake i've ever made in life i've had an errection in one hand and a bud light in the other
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
Randomize