I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
pretty sure 5 days for a bachelor party in Vegas is too long when even the stripper giving me a lapdance says "wow that's a long time!"
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
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