Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
I'm sooo using this pickup line: "Baby, its not the 2.5 inches... Its the 200 pounds behind it"
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
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