So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
I found an industrial strength sharpie in the drawer so I started writing BONER JAM 2014 on everyone's foreheads so they kicked me out
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize
