I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
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