come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
just found out that she named her cat after me.
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
Randomize