And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
Randomize
