okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
