I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
i'm at a stripclub and this bitch just lit her nipples on fire!
There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
I was thinking about baking his mom "sorry you found out i was sleeping with your son" cupcakes
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
Randomize
