just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
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