lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
Randomize
