He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
They both showed up at the same time... to surprise me. One had flowers and the other had chocolates. Needless to say, I will be at the bar all weekend long trying to figure out how this happens.
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
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