Have you finally orgasmed yet?
im gay
i know
yea but for you.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
My pants zipper is stuck halfway down. I have to interview an intern later. This day is gonna be amazing,
Well I accidentally flashed a 76 year old woman, i'm in a house full of republicans and Im almost drunk enough to give the gay rights speech so i'd say this wedding reception is going great
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
Randomize
