When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
she texted me 'with freud,' which i thought was drunk for 'i'm with my friend.' but nope, she was actually on a statue of the psychologist sigmund freud.
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
Randomize
