sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
accidentally stumbled into a construction site at 3am on the way home. The bulldozer was locked so we had to settle for rerouting traffic with all the orange cones...
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
THERE IS A VERY SMALL CHILD YELLING OUTSIDE OF MY DOOR. THE NEXT TIME YOU TELL ME YOUR TOO BIG FOR A CONDOM I'M GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE DICK.
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
Randomize
