with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
When we were finished she immediately got up, cut a star out of a piece of paper, colored it gold, taped it to my chest and deemed me the Sheriff of Sex.
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