He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
The hardest part about being a child of divorce is when you're at your dad's house but your condoms are at your mom's house.
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
If I ever say "I'm never drinking again" just hand me a bottle of jack. I'll snap out of it.
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
Randomize