It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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