I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize
