Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
Randomize
