I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone
i found a twelve pack under my bed. and a six pack in my closet. I'm like a fucking alcoholic squirrel.
It's hard to be a gentleman when a girl pauses her karaoke version of "a whole new world," and proceeds to tell the entire bar that she wants your cock in her mouth.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
she texted me 'with freud,' which i thought was drunk for 'i'm with my friend.' but nope, she was actually on a statue of the psychologist sigmund freud.
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
Randomize
