what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
Can someone please remind me later tonight that there's a taco in my purse. I may get drunk and forget I put it there
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize
