What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
Just high enough for therapy.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
Randomize
