ya dads aren't the best wingmen
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
Just saw my boss eat a banana in three bites.
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
Life Epiphany- I need to have children so I can be the drunk grandma at family functions. Its my destiny.
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
Randomize