Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
Randomize
