I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
Lucky for you, I found your phone.....Not so lucky for you, it was in the bottom of your vomit-filled trashcan.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
The difference in our lives is summed up perfectly in that you woke up next to a 6'4" guy with an accent and I woke up next to an unwrapped piece of string cheese.
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
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