Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
I party with great urgency now.
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